Monday, May 13, 2013

If you really knew me, which you obviously don't. you would know that my name isn't Moby S. Charelston. you would know that my name is Jakob (kobi) Alexander Montandon Veroda the 1st.





If you really knew me:
you would know that i hate slow dancing.
you would know that i am most happy when those that are around me are happy
you would know that i am so ready to get out of here and leave high school
but if you really know me you would know that i am very scared to leave

If you really know me:
you would know that i hate being called stupid
you would know that i have been in special ed ever sense the 3rd grade until now
you would also know that i graduated from special ed last quarter proving all the bullies and unbelievers wrong!
you would know that i always root for the under dog even when they are in the wrong.
you would know that i love cereal and could and have eaten it for every meal


If you really know me:
you would know that i hate posting on this blog, partially because i am lazy and the other half because i feel like it is competitive to see who will make hall of fame, i feel like having a pen name is good but for some people it allows them to live a lie (i only say that because i have written lies on here already)
you would know that i was always scared until the 10th grade and cared way to much about others opinions
you would also know that i have now shared my real name because ever sense the 10th grade i stopped caring, and sens then i did things for me. and refused to let my true self be locked away anymore. im just proud of my name and my f*cked up head. that gets splatted all over my posts. its easier for me to write in my own name and sing in my own voice.
you would know that i know you are a lot more free and happy when you stop caring about what others think

If you really knew me:
you would know that even though i was born and raised in the church i am not truly converted and that i am currently meeting with the missionaries now
you would know that even though i see the church as being so confusing and even though i never bare my testimony i love it. and so far it has never once made me sad.        I love the the church and what it teaches, its its followers that are faulty. but then again we are only human.
you would know that i still have all my action figures in my closet and refuse to let my nieces and nephews play with them
you would know that i am addicted to music, and Sigur Ros is the best band PERIOD.

If you really knew me:
you would know that i hate being apart one of the biggest clicks in the school. the hipsters. and that my biggest regret of high school is allowing this click to keep me from meeting all of you beautiful people. I hate how people have told me that i am very intimidating due to me being what you would call "a cool hipster"
you would know that i am a very excepting person and am a very genunie person.
you would know that i love to talk and im even better at listening
you would know that i am always here.

If you really knew me:
you would know that i have never kissed anyone
you would also know that i have turned people down and sometimes regret doing so
you would also know that i hate regret so much because i own so much stock in it.
you would know that i am content with life and what it throws at me. even though i get pissed at that bitch we all call life.

If you really knew me:
you would know that i really like you. i know i don't know you, but what i do know is that i cant judge you for your insecurities and differences, because its most often our insecurities and differences that keep us from being liked. we all have them. so don't be shy about them. live your life knowing we all have struggle
you would know that i want someone to love but im in no hurry
you would know that i also want that first kiss but once again i really don't care about when it comes, sure ill be the weird guy who hasn't kissed anyone in high school but at least i haven't thrown it away and i want it to mean something, something real

If you really knew me you would know that i could just keep going and going
but i feel like if you knew anything more about me you would be scared of me. if arnt already.
but i will just keep it to my self, im really good at that.

If you really knew how i feel right now you would know that i feel free
i am free from what was an endless torture of the grade school
but there you go. now you know everything you need to know + sum. and so dose everyone ellse. and i.
i feel free.

so for all you haters out there tell the crowed something about me they don't already know!

im always here -Kobi




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