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Im afraid.
are you afraid?
please tell me you are afraid..
because being afraid a lone is no fun
but i find my self there all the time and i am getting to the point where being alone is no longer frightening. 
but now i think about my future am i going to be a lone forever?
im afraid that i will never find this thing called true real love. that everyone seems to be talking about. 
and im afraid that i will never be loved or when i am i wont know how to give it back.
im afraid i will be loved and cherish it and wont give in back. 
and she will leave and i will cherish what once was and be happy being alone.

Im Afraid that i have fallen in love with myself and that i will just keep it that way.

Im afraid of this man they call satin but lately ive been hanging out with him.
and now i am afraid of god
i know god loves me. but god wants me to change some things in my heart
and i am afraid that he will ask me to do just that
but i dont know how
how
im afraid of the how.
how did we get here
how long till we go home
how do we know what were doing
how is it that people can be so cruel
how is it that humans can be so unpassionet
how do we learn to love how do we move on
how.

Im afraid of  posting on this blog
because im afraid of you guys reading it
Im afraid of regret because its all around me
and ive become quite used to regret because Im afraid of my potenshal

Even though i tell my self i dont care
im afraid of people judging me
im afraid

Im afraid of not being loved back
and im that last free puppy in a box and im afraid that no one loves me and that i will be taken to the pound
the pound. a place for broken animals and those that just messed it all up
but im just a pup how did i mess it all up this early in the game, why can no one love me.
why cant no one see the love in me.

and i see myself in so many other people.
and cant help but cry for them
and see how we are all impounded pups not because we are bad, but rather that no one gave us the chance
no one took the time to look past our cute faces and pretty coats
and it was ages before someone noticed the lost pup
but by that time it seemed to late.
lonely was my homie
and im afraid that i dont know who to except your love even though i want it.
i want your love but i am afraid of your love.

but hear me when i say im so tired of being alone.
and afraid that it will never stop.
but im afraid of you love because love is a bitch
and love has bitched with me far to many times
and im afraid because love is essential to life
and aint nobody to bitchen for love

im afraid like dogs are afraid of the pound
im afraid like baby bird is afraid of its first flight
im afraid like nature is of polution
im afraid like moms for their children
like dads for their work
like siblings for...
well i guess i dont know that, most my siblings moved out when i was a young age
i guess lonely has practiced a lot on me.
im afraid.
im afraid every day because every day i fight for survival

not physical survival.
but physical survival.

its called survival of the fittest.
but i cant help but feel like everyone got a head start.
and im afraid i will never catch up.
nore am i any where near fit to do so.

im afraid that you will read this
and im afraid that it will mean nothing to you
and that is why im afraid of writing on here
and why im afraid of posting it once i write it.

because im writing this for me
but you get to read it

and most of all im afraid that you will rad this and try to figure me out from my posts
but i ask you kindly to please stop. because im afraid that i haven't even figured me out.
so just stop now its a lost caus

bust promis me this that you will stand by me and hold my hand because im tired of being alone.
and now im afraid that none of you will take me seriously

im afraid
are you?
can we be afraid together.

-Moby